Mass Effect 2
I’m back into Mass Effect 2, because I need to pass this already with the rumbles of Mass Effect 3 already on the horizon. I played through a bit, and rescued some more of my bros, and I must comment on one of the rock-stupidest plans by a bad guy I’ve seen in a long time. It makes a small amount of sense; of course it’s a video game and of course you need a challenge where you kill some dudes, but the set-up here is just so dumb.
So you’re going onto a prison ship in order to pick up a prisoner who will be really helpful to you, a powerful psionic named Jack. You show up, and the guards politely ask to have your guns. This makes complete sense; it’s a prison ship after all, and you have some powerful guns. You aren’t even allowed to comply, you just keep on shouting that you absolutely will not, and eventually the warden relents, saying that security can handle three armed people walking around the ship. You walk around for a bit, stop a beating if you feel like it, and then go to processing. You step through a door to see an empty cell, and the warden gets on the intercom and politely asks you to get in and become his prisoner. You say no, and then shoot your way out to find Jack.
Now. The warden’s motives suddenly make no sense. If the warden intended to kidnap you the entire time, why didn’t he confiscate your guns? I’d understand if a snivelly middle manager relented and let you in, but this is the man who plans to keep you hostage. Why would he give you an advantage at all? Why does he let you tool around the ship for as long as you want with your two powerful allies? Why doesn’t he try to separate you from your friends? Why doesn’t he try to trick you into a cell, instead choosing to politely ask you to be held captive? Why don’t they use those shield pylons that they make a point of acknowledging to trap you? Why does he lead you to the part of the ship that’s practically adjacent to the criminal you’re here to get anyway? You’ve never been here before, you wouldn’t know where to go to find Jack. Why don’t they seal the door and gas the room? Why choose to kidnap you in a room with adequate cover? Why don’t they do anything besides send in twelve guards to get shot? This is the absolute laziest plot contrivance; the warden goes out of his way to choose the only plan that you can quite easily escape from. It’s almost like he had the idea to betray you while he was walking down the hall with you, and had absolutely no time to prepare. It’s not like he didn’t know you were coming.
Hell, Shepard shouldn’t have even gone inside. He should have sent some scrubs, maybe Miranda or Jacob or even Kelly, just so the primary investment wasn’t being put in a vulnerable position. Then they could get kidnapped, and you would have to rush in and rescue them. At least that would have made some sense, and still have been an engaging mission.
But maybe this idiot just can’t do anything right. After killing all the guards, you head to the cryo tube where they are holding Jack (which, stupidly, is right next door to where they tried to kidnap you). You are ready to open it, except one of your teammates comments that if you open up the tube, it will release all the prisoners in the cellblock. What? Why? Again, I’d understand if we had to blow the power or something, but we are in the cellblock control room. They can’t independently open the individual cells? You’d think that would be a common feature. But screw it, you open it anyway, and this stupid is on Shepard. Jack completely freaks and kills all the robots in the room, then blows a hole in the ship and goes on a rampage. Shepard and crew just kinda watch this happen, not once interfering or even saying hi before Jack is long gone. Then you have to chase Jack through the ship as Jack causes hull damage and explosive decompression in nine of the 30 cell blocks, killing thousands.
Was Jack going to react this way no matter what? In that case, why release Jack at all? Why isn’t Jack dead? This is obviously an unstable individual, and the warden must have known something like this would have happened, so why even make it a possibility? Even if Jack’s too valuable to kill, why doesn’t the cryo opening process keep the prisoner unconscious until he are off the dang ship? This warden is just the worst person at his job. Colonel Klink was better at keeping prisoners under control than this guy.
I’m just really disappointed because Bioware is usually quite good at stringing together a good plot, and here it feels like they handed it off to an intern and asked him to make it happen without any regard for how stupid everyone would need to act in order for the events to happen as prescribed. It’s very dumb, and I’m going to try my best to forget about this.
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